Broken reflections

I casually prodded the almost runny scrambled eggs with an old twisted fork, staring into the yellow goo for answers that just wouldn't come. The man sitting across from me told stories of his fractured life. Things aren't good.

He said this. She said that. There were actions that led to accusations that led to arguments that led to war. It is too familiar of a tale. It could be my story. It could be yours. This time, though, it's his. Words that were unthinkable just a few years ago are now the most common. Words like "hate" and "divorce."

As I gazed over my soggy, room-temperature hash browns into those eyes that were so desperately seeking answers, I was surprised by what I saw. Myself. My road has had different twists and turns, but has been a story filled with brokenness followed by redemption.

So I give my friend the answer. It may not be the answer he wants. It is the answer that has never failed me, though. Jesus. Only Jesus.

"I know you want the relationships that meant so much to you to be restored. I understand that you want to be seen as a man an not a monster. The only path out is Jesus. Only Jesus.

Focus on Him. Yield your life to Him. Learn to delight in His word and His presence again, just like in the old days. Remember how when Jesus was all you needed, life made sense? You were blessed beyond expectation. Everything on this world that means anything to you is a byproduct of that close relationship with Jesus. Have you ever been more fully a man than when you were close to him? Did those that knew you best ever call you a monster when your relationship with Christ was at its strongest?

I can't guarantee a happy ending. But if Jesus is the true desire of your heart, you will never be let down.

I know this not because it's the Christian thing to say. I say it because when I look into your soul, I see a reflection of myself. I see my own brokenness and I know we aren't that different. And I know that I need Jesus every second of every day. Life means nothing without Him. Yes, He is our savior, but He is also our sustainer. I tell you to lean on Him because I tell myself that every day."

I don't know how this story ends. I have a prayer. I have a hope. Because of Jesus, my friend does too.

No one is ever beyond redemption. No one is ever beyond hope. No one is ever beyond the reach of Jesus.

Just Move

Today was the 7th consecutive day I have gone for a long walk.

Seven days. That's not long.

I haven't done anything dramatic, just carved out thirty minutes to an hour a day to bundle up and get outside.

Things are already changing, though. 

My legs feel stronger. I've dropped a few pounds. There is a tangible difference.

As that inspirational revelation struck, I realized parallels to my spiritual walk.

Sometimes, for months on end...

I do nothing. 

There is no spiritual growth.

I yearn for intimacy with God, but...

I don't seek it. 

Eventually I turn back in a number of small ways and notice immediate differences in my life.

It starts with baby steps...more consistent, focused prayer, and focused time in the Word. Sometimes it starts with a musical worship experience.

My walk is shaky, my steps tentative. But as I persistently (if not consistently) continue this journey, I continue to be amazed, humbled, and honored at what God does.

He is there. 

Often He'll show off. I feel my spiritual legs strengthen and the journey becomes easier. He will remind me that He has been there all along, waiting for me to start moving again.

Wanting something doesn't make it so. Sometimes you have to just move.

When you are stuck, what do you do to get moving again?

Enthusiasm

Trust 30 : Day 22 (prompt by Mars Dorian)

Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.” is a great line from Emerson. If there’s no enthusiasm in what you do, it won’t be remarkable and certainly won’t connect with people on an emotional basis. But, if you put that magic energy into all of your work, you can create something that touches people on a deeper level. How can you bring MORE enthusiasm into your work? What do you have to think or believe about your work to be totally excited about it? Answer it now.

Once again I risk falling into the realm of cliche, which I typically try to avoid, but nothing creates more enthusiasm for me than following God's will. I realize this makes no sense to a lot of people. It's just...I've had my own hopes and dreams for most of my life and they all pale in comparison to what I've seen God do in the past few years.

I find that this naturally touches people on a deeper level as it grows. Lives are transformed, relationships reconciled, and the past is overcome. The energy and enthusiasm generated from following God's will cascades from more to more as it is experienced. It does have enemies, though.

The first is nostalgia. By this I mean clinging to what God has done instead of what He has yet to do. Many people have a profound spiritual experience and then spend the rest of their lives resting on it. It's not unlike an athlete that throws a perfect game in high school and spends the rest of his life reliving that same memory. It was an incredible accomplishment, but it's causing the present to stagnate and the future to die. It's important always be looking forward with eager anticipation to what God has planned for us next. As long as we're breathing there is more for us to do.

The second is fear of abandonment. Even though I know God has done tremendous things for me and through me, I fear that He is finished with me. This anxiety causes me to doubt the calling I hear. It undermines the work that is left to be done.

The third is fear of the unknown. That is, we fear what God has planned for us next. This is the "what if" game. What if God wants me to sell my house? What if He wants me to move to another country? What if He wants me to quit my job and live as a homeless person? I'm comforable with what God has done in my so far because I know how it has turned out. Sometimes it's tempting to stop seeking His will because we don't want to turn into one of "those people." You might know the type...totally sold out to Christ like nothing on this earth really matters.  Weird.

So, what do I need to think or believe about my work to be totally excited about it? I need to believe that God put me here for a reason. That through Him the purpose will be revealed. When it's time to move on, He will make it abundantly clear.