I have a love/hate relationship with writing. I love to write. But my standard for myself is so high that I can't allow myself to write. I am always waiting for the elusive perfect and unique collision of inspiration and availability.
During the year that I lead worship, I sent out a set list to the band every week. The idea was that everyone would be on the same page showing up to practice, plus it allows us to connect during the week. We were all so new to the experience, I thought I should send out some inspirational words...share some verses and maybe some of my own insight and observations. This weekly email became something I had to do. And I couldn't just leave it at the list of songs, I had to share more. After a few months, I realized that I was doing a lot of writing...and that I was actually looking forward to sitting down and typing out those emails. I might not have any idea of what I was going to say when I started, but I would find myself writing for hours sometimes. And it wasn't because I was inspired, it was because I made the time.
My time as worship leader was up a few months ago and I've not written much since then. I find myself in a place where I have many thoughts I need to work out and it seems writing is the only way for me to do that. I can't seem to make the time.
One thing I love to do is teach. I love the way the spirit inspires me every week, I love searching through God's word for more inspiration, and I love getting up and leading people to a new understanding of stories they thought they new. More than anything, I love seeing Christ change lives. Including my own, which He does every time I teach! Win-win. One of my biggest challenges is limiting how much I cover each week. Every week my wife asks me how it's going and my response has been consistently the same "Way too much to cover, not enough time." Tonight, as I was down to the bottom of the second page of typing, I started to think..."what if I organized my thoughts and threw them onto the blog and then simplified what I taught." That would allow the class to be a little more interactive and discussion-oriented while allowing me to hit all the points I wanted to hit (just not in class).
In the interest of staying out of the state of denial, I would like to acknowledge right here and now that I understand a few things about this blog: 1.) the only person that ever reads it is my wife, and she only reads it because I get cranky if she doesn't. 2.) most people out there aren't interested in my 1,000 word rambling about Elijah or any of my other ramblings. But, I seem to have more in me than I can contain, so this blog will continue to function as mile markers along the road of my own spiritual growth and development. If someone else finds it and gets something out of it, that'd be super too.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Monday, February 28, 2011
Ecclesiastes (it's not what you think)
"For everything there is a season." Ecclesiastes 3:1
A few years ago I had my life changed by a ministry at my church. I was a 30-something new believer after a life time of intentional and deliberate atheism. When God pulled me out of that, I found myself seeking Him, looking for opportunities to go deeper. I had an unquenchable hunger but I couldn't find anything that could fill my appetite. I had a few good "feedings", notably a season of "Men's Fraternity" that was life changing for me and a "Marriage Encounter" with my wife. But both of those were short term events that ended too soon, thrusting me back out into the real world desperately searching for more.
When I hooked up with this other ministry, whose members were often referred to as "Those People", I found that I was surrounded by imperfect people that were not only seeking God openly and honestly, but they were clinging to Him for their next breath. There was an honesty that I had not seen in the secular or Christian world before. There was also a common yearning for spiritual intimacy that I had never seen anywhere. I found it refreshing and inspiring.
It's been a few years now. God has changed me, changed my family, and changed my church. When I look back at the last year I find it hard to believe all that He has done. I led worship for a year, every Friday night. 14 months ago I had never sung in public. 28 months ago I had never sung in private. I don't claim to be good, but God gave me just enough to get me through. And that's the tip of the iceberg. I could (and probably should've been) fill this blog with stories of life change and miracles.
But, for everything there is a season. The time for that ministry at our church is coming to an end. We have two more Friday nights and then it's over. Yes, I know I will miss it. I will miss the brothers and sisters that I have served with and whose lives I have seen changed. None of us will ever be the same.
I believe that God never meant for us to get too embedded in our ministries. When we do, I think the human tendency is to believe that it is the ministry that saves us, it is the ministry that keeps us healed. Our nature is to cling so tightly to the things of this earth...it is vital to recognize when it's time to move on. When the pillar of fire moves, it's time to pack the tents. And it's time to pack the tents.
God may have parted the Red Sea to get us to where we're at. That might have been an awesome miracle, but we're not to the promised land yet. He still has plans for us, and it is still our calling to follow Him wherever it may lead. Even if it means letting go of what we cling to.
So tonight I find myself looking forward. What does God have planned? I don't know, but I await it with anticipation. Instead of being bitter or let down by this ending, I am excited about the new beginning.
A few years ago I had my life changed by a ministry at my church. I was a 30-something new believer after a life time of intentional and deliberate atheism. When God pulled me out of that, I found myself seeking Him, looking for opportunities to go deeper. I had an unquenchable hunger but I couldn't find anything that could fill my appetite. I had a few good "feedings", notably a season of "Men's Fraternity" that was life changing for me and a "Marriage Encounter" with my wife. But both of those were short term events that ended too soon, thrusting me back out into the real world desperately searching for more.
When I hooked up with this other ministry, whose members were often referred to as "Those People", I found that I was surrounded by imperfect people that were not only seeking God openly and honestly, but they were clinging to Him for their next breath. There was an honesty that I had not seen in the secular or Christian world before. There was also a common yearning for spiritual intimacy that I had never seen anywhere. I found it refreshing and inspiring.
It's been a few years now. God has changed me, changed my family, and changed my church. When I look back at the last year I find it hard to believe all that He has done. I led worship for a year, every Friday night. 14 months ago I had never sung in public. 28 months ago I had never sung in private. I don't claim to be good, but God gave me just enough to get me through. And that's the tip of the iceberg. I could (and probably should've been) fill this blog with stories of life change and miracles.
But, for everything there is a season. The time for that ministry at our church is coming to an end. We have two more Friday nights and then it's over. Yes, I know I will miss it. I will miss the brothers and sisters that I have served with and whose lives I have seen changed. None of us will ever be the same.
I believe that God never meant for us to get too embedded in our ministries. When we do, I think the human tendency is to believe that it is the ministry that saves us, it is the ministry that keeps us healed. Our nature is to cling so tightly to the things of this earth...it is vital to recognize when it's time to move on. When the pillar of fire moves, it's time to pack the tents. And it's time to pack the tents.
God may have parted the Red Sea to get us to where we're at. That might have been an awesome miracle, but we're not to the promised land yet. He still has plans for us, and it is still our calling to follow Him wherever it may lead. Even if it means letting go of what we cling to.
So tonight I find myself looking forward. What does God have planned? I don't know, but I await it with anticipation. Instead of being bitter or let down by this ending, I am excited about the new beginning.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Love God. Love People. Happy Holidays!
When asked what the most important commandment was, Jesus replied that we are to love God and love each other. I've heard sin described as anything that comes between us and God. To get a little more specific, anything that comes between us and obedience to God.
So now the holiday season is upon us. A time of reflection and joy. A time to come together with loved ones and a time to help those in need. It's the perfect time for those of us that have found the joy of new life in Christ to live out the greatest commandment.
When the sky turns gray and the temperature drops, peace on earth seems to be far from everyone's mind. Instead, the air is full of upturned noses smugly declaring "Jesus is the reason for the season". There are boycotts of stores and parades due to titles not being reverent enough. While I'm sure many religious leaders of Jesus' time would agree with these practices and whole-heartedly participate in them, I have to wonder if Jesus himself would. Is this the way He intended for us to behave when He instructed us to love people?
It seems that Paul went to great lengths to advise Christians on how to live and how to spread the good news. He repeatedly emphasized the importance of being respectful and loving of those outside the church. He instructed us to do whatever possible short of sin in order to fit in and to not offend. Paul knew that hate doesn't turn hearts. He knew that because he listened to Jesus. He also knew that through experience.
So when you are confronted with the inevitable "Happy Holidays" this season, don't respond with a snide "Merry CHRISTmas". Respond with love. Give a smile, a nod, and a best wishes for the season. If possible, engage in a friendly discussion. If the Holy Spirit chooses you to try and witness to the person, it's important to build a relationship based on trust and love, not on judgement and condemnation.
So now the holiday season is upon us. A time of reflection and joy. A time to come together with loved ones and a time to help those in need. It's the perfect time for those of us that have found the joy of new life in Christ to live out the greatest commandment.
When the sky turns gray and the temperature drops, peace on earth seems to be far from everyone's mind. Instead, the air is full of upturned noses smugly declaring "Jesus is the reason for the season". There are boycotts of stores and parades due to titles not being reverent enough. While I'm sure many religious leaders of Jesus' time would agree with these practices and whole-heartedly participate in them, I have to wonder if Jesus himself would. Is this the way He intended for us to behave when He instructed us to love people?
It seems that Paul went to great lengths to advise Christians on how to live and how to spread the good news. He repeatedly emphasized the importance of being respectful and loving of those outside the church. He instructed us to do whatever possible short of sin in order to fit in and to not offend. Paul knew that hate doesn't turn hearts. He knew that because he listened to Jesus. He also knew that through experience.
So when you are confronted with the inevitable "Happy Holidays" this season, don't respond with a snide "Merry CHRISTmas". Respond with love. Give a smile, a nod, and a best wishes for the season. If possible, engage in a friendly discussion. If the Holy Spirit chooses you to try and witness to the person, it's important to build a relationship based on trust and love, not on judgement and condemnation.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)