Redeemed

Murder. Pain. Loss.

The past can be a weight. The magnitude of the tragedy overwhelming. Every time your eyes close, you see their faces. Sons taken too soon. The anger rises anew. Lost jobs are insignificant compared to the lost loved ones. Lost freedom. But you go on.

I met him on a trip. He was hired to do construction. We were building a church. We were also building THE church.

North and South Americans stacked concrete blocks, threw cement, painted walls, and tiled a roof. Shoulder to shoulder, they joyfully toiled from sunrise to sunset until everyone was exhausted. Christians and non-Christians alike, simply working with and loving each other.

Each day on the long walk home, he would pick up scrap wood. Someday his house would have real walls. A roof. Someday.

But God... God is a rescuer. He is a redeemer.

"...the Lord has anointed me

to proclaim good news to the poor.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,

to proclaim freedom for the captives

and release from darkness for the prisoners" Isaiah 61:1

Late in the week a decision was made. A decision for Christ. And life became new. Restored. Redeemed.

Embraced by both the savior and His church, something special was found. Forgiveness. Community. Reconciliation. Hope. Life.

His house now has a roof. And walls. His precious family is safer than they have been in years. Because of a church? Because of THE church? Because of the redeemer! Jesus reached out through the obedient workers. The light of Jesus was shining through them all week. It drew him. It gave him a new hope and a new community. And the trajectory of six precious lives changed forever. For eternity.

Lost shades

My shades and I in Gravatai, Brazil 2011

I lost my sunglasses yesterday. They were old. The lenses were scratched. Superglue held the rubber nose pieces in place. In just the last two weeks I had been thinking about getting a new pair. But that's not the point. I hate to lose things. Maybe I'd eccentric, maybe I'm mental. But I hate to lose things.

This past week was awesome. Jon Acuff's great (and top secret) "Start Experiment" kicked off Monday. I woke up at 5AM every day and wrote, wrote, wrote. Our small group of local STARTers (props to group #60) has inspired each other while kicking our own goals in the pants. But Saturday I lost my sunglasses.

Because of my eccentricities (or insanity), this awesome week almost became defined by my loss, not by my gains. One thousand incredible experiences, a renewed walk with God, a handful of new and incredible friends were almost overshadowed by shades. Almost.

Walking the street of Queluz

Today, my task is to make a quit list. Things I can quit today to free up more time, energy, or hope for my dream.

With Milton and Ricardo in Gravatai 2011

1. Stop letting temporary, trivial, or insignificant things overshadow the awesome, life-changing, or even ordinary things in life. Let. It. Go.
2. Quit the negative self-talk. My wife is my biggest fan, speaking words of encouragement into my life daily. She needs some support, so I think I'll help her out. My action step: find one promise of God in the Bible every morning and then keep it in my head all day.
3. Quit participating in gossip. Last week was so good that I became much more aware of the negative talk around me. I realized that I normally participate in it. Talking about others is an energy drain, unless we are bragging on them.

Yeah, I'm sentimental. Those glasses had been with me to Brazil. Twice. I wore them everywhere. I've walked miles and miles with them on my head or my face. The thing is, those glasses aren't the memory. Those shades weren't the experience. They were just a $10 pair of Walmart shade. Those experiences were awesome, the memories were awesome, walking with God was awesome. Those shades were just shades.

In an old cemetery in Queluz, 2012

Finding God's will

It is human nature to wrestle with finding God's "will". If we take our beliefs seriously, we'd like to please God, right? For Christians, I realize that in a lot of situations the answers are already made clear in the Bible. For example, I doubt many devout Christians wrestle with the decision of whether they should knock over a bank or shoot a stranger. But what about for the more nuanced questions, particularly the ones to which there isn't necessarily a wrong answer?

Should I go to college in state or out of state? Should I stay at my current job or start looking elsewhere? What area of my church should I volunteer in? Should we have another child or should we stop at two?

A friend of mine was talking about this recently and summarized it pretty well... God's will calls me to trust God, have courageous faith, and set aside my own agenda. Those are great standards to set and I can guarantee they will lead to a life of adventure. When done with a heart set on going deeper with God, this method will get you there. For many of us in the United States, that third point might actually be the most difficult. Trusting God and having courageous faith are no problem if we think God will bend to our whims. We so often want God to conform to our own agenda...we aren't willing to die to ourselves and submit to His will.

When I returned from Brazil in 2011, I was faced with a number of opportunities that seemed to be divine. Want to be a chaplain at the State Fair? How about doing a weekly prayer walk in the neighborhood around the church? Use vacation time to attend a conference about reaching unreached and unengaged people groups? Continue the monthly soup kitchen? I needed a way to find answers.

I discovered that for me it meant to look for the path (or choice) that leads to "more God." More trust in God. More faith in God. More experience with God. More dependence on God. More God. Less me. Less of my own fear. Less of my own doubt. Less of my own agenda. Less of my own need for security. Less of my own need for approval from other people.

A missionary I met in Brazil told me that his goal was that in every situation, his response to God would be: "I'm all in. Whatever you ask." His life reflected it, too. By any American standard, he was living a life that was radical. He knew that nothing in his life mattered if Jesus wasn't the center of it all.

Some people think I'm crazy for flying half way across the world to build a chapel and share the gospel. But that's where God has led me, so that is where I'll go. In every other situation, too, I'm always looking for the path that leads to "more God."